As usual I am unable to sleep, feeling oddly unaccomplished for the day. It is this feeling that keeps me up, as well as insidious bugs that persist on biting me. They must have been drawn in from the rain.

Yet I feel like dancing. My writer's block is gone and I am writing feverishly again. 6 submission-worthy poems in a week. Not usual by far, but most certainly an improvement from the last 2 years. The thing I can say about A Cold Day in Hell is that it is very satisfying.

Late at night, I tend to get very pensive and introspective.

Looking back, it has been a rather strange year. Many new experiences and interesting challenges. Problems to solve and problems that don't want to be solved.

I had thought that many around me had changed. But I was wrong. I changed. The core of me hasn't: values, priorities, etc. But a substantial part of me has. I can't pinpoint it now, but many things that happened in the last year - this mad roller coaster - has changed me.

I am happier and more hopeful but also sad at the things I am letting go. Yes, right now it feels like a cold day in hell.

But I *am* looking forward to watching Star Wars III tomorrow. :D I'll find the silver lining, even if it means I have to fly to look for it. I have to, because no one else is going to find it for me.

Sweet Boy keeping me company here by his couch. Kaku coming up to me when I went to get a glass of milk for seratonin. Sam joining her. Kaitlyn saying, 'Bye, Two", and my Dad and Mom laughing.

I think I am ready to go to sleep. The bad dreams are gone.

I wrote another poem while waiting for my Dad. It's a darkly humourous (well, to me at least) poem called A Cold Day in Hell.

Took my Dad for his usual therapeutic massage and then we discovered a nice coffee shop that sold just about every kind of Chinese noodle dish you could find in a hawker centre. We had dinner there and drinks, and then headed over to my brother's place.

His computer was down so I tried to find a solution for it. He downloaded Knoppix to attempt to access his data. It should be a clincher. Meanwhile I played with Kaitlyn, who was rather delighted by the attention. She allowed me to hug her and then spin her around upside down. In between, she was happy to look into the mirror and baby talk to herself. It was really cute to watch.

Finally we had to leave. She followed us down and put on her little blue boots. Her Dad picked her up and said, no, we're home. Grandma, Grandpa, and Aunty Lyn are leaving. Say Bye! And she did. I said, "Bye, Two (my nickname for her)", and she said, "Bye, Two", and waved.

At home, the cats sniffed around the groceries I bought. Had a hot shower, petted Kaku, and fed the kids. And now here I am, still up, typing up my 4 new poems. :D

I received my labels from Story House just the other day. Gorgeous as always. I was delighted they bought Boy I Love You, a poem about Boy. :D Their coffee is the best I've ever sniffed. Try it!

Last night I wrote 3 and 3/4 poems - I fell asleep before I finished the 4th one. 3 submission-worthy poems Resolution, Planet-Hopper (maybe I should retitle this), and Dear Doctor will be out doing the rounds soon after I look at them again.

Very very exciting stuff today! :D Here are extracts:

Role Reversal: Planet Controls a Star

Extract:

In a reversal of roles, a planet [tau Bootis ("tau Boo" for short) – a star 50 light years away with a planet in a tight, 3.3-day orbit around it] has gravitationally bullied its star to rotate in step with the planet's orbit. The star's behavior is similar to that of our Moon, which turns just fast enough to keep one face always pointing at the Earth.

Although it is suspected that many of the close-in exoplanets – so-called "hot Jupiters" – are tidally locked to their stars, this is the first detection of a star tidally locked to its planet. Knowing that the star’s rotation is synchronized should reveal much more about this strange system.

According to [Andrew Cameron of the University of St. Andrews in Scotland], the synchronization of the tau Boo system probably took a billion years – the star likely began spinning faster by stealing angular momentum from its companion.

Because of tidal friction, almost all systems eventually become synchronized. "Given long enough, the Earth will face the Moon," noted Cameron. The time for synchronization is faster the closer and heavier the synchronizer is in comparison to the synchronizee. Most stars do not live long enough to become locked to their planets.

In the case of tau Boo, the planet weighs about 0.5% that of its star – compared to Jupiter, which is 0.1% the mass of our Sun. But more importantly, tau Boo b is 100 times closer in than Jupiter is.

Cosmos 1 Solar Sail Spacecraft Heads to Loading Site

Extract:

A private team of space-savvy civilians has hit a major milestone in plans to launch the first spacecraft propelled by sunlight after shipping the small probe to be loaded atop ballistic missile.

The solar sail-propelled Cosmos 1 vehicle, hailed as the world’s first solar sail spacecraft, has left its Moscow testing center and now bound to Severomorsk, Russia, where it will be loaded into a modified intercontinental ballistic missile (ICBM) and readied for a June 21 launch, mission planners announced Monday.

W00t! :D

I've completed 2 poems: Death Comes Too Quickly and A Moonlight Dream and sent them to Wicked Hollow! :D W00t!

This felt like a long weekend, I am pleased to say. Although foremost on my mind were my awful dreams of the week before, a rather long partay Friday night, Buffy Fest all weekend, and nice meals with my folks. I am also very happy to see my niece turning out to be a lot like me when I was her age (her poor mom).

Friday night found me at Raffles City with the girls for dinner and coffee. We chatted for ages and finally dispersed to various locations around the island. I met Lena and Michelle at Bala afterwards for some serious noshing and then headed to Zouk to meet a zillion friends out for the chill over the long weekend.

It was rockin'! :D I found myself ruling on the platform, dancing with a bunch of rad dudes to some pretty awesome music. It felt exhilarating and I was right back to when I was sweet seventeen again. :p This rather intoxicated Aussie guy right beside me even said, wow, you're an amazing dancer. Hehe...

Even after all these years, I have to say, I still feel most at home at Zouk. It was my second home for most of my teens and early 20s... ahem... not too long ago. Everywhere I turned there were memories, most of them fine. And maybe one or two unfine.

I'd been hankering for a swim all week last week. But on Saturday it rained, and Sunday and today I felt rather unmotivated to go for a swim, plus I'd already settled into Buffy Fest 2005 so decided to hole up and get slayin'.

My hair's grown very fast and I meant to work on it this weekend but it never happened.

Hung out with the cats quite a bit. Spent some quality time sitting with Kaku out back, and talking with Boy, who did appreciate my company. The other three stayed in the living room with me during Buffy Fest or else napped on my blanket while I wrote. It was lovely. :)

I stopped playing WoW for a while... and painting. I'd like to work on my poetry.

Speaking of which, the good thing is, in between Buffy and eating, I managed to write about 8 poems, two of which are in the midst of editing to be sent out. The rest, well, aren't quite speculative work so they can wait.

It's going to be a long busy week ahead. I best start winding down now. Have a good week, y'all, gentle readers.

Is your cat OCD?

Introduction:

Repetitive, relatively non-varying behaviour patterns that appear to have no purpose can be described as obsessive-compulsive disorders. In cats, such behaviours include compulsive pacing, repetitive meowing (vocalizing), fabric sucking and chewing, or licking and pulling hair. The exact cause or causes of compulsive behaviour in otherwise normal cats have not been identified.

This too shall pass.

Nope, not mine yet. :p I'm watching it on Thursday night at GV but until then, here is Phil Plait's review. Spoiler alert!

(And yes, I've read all the reviews because 1) I can't wait, 2) we all already know how the story is going to end, and 3) contrary to popular belief, Star Wars isn't sacred to me the way Blade or X-Men is, so the perfect alignment of seats, perfect viewing experience, and no external influences about the story thang doesn't hold.)

Jon, you'll be very proud of me. I wrote 2 poems last night while watching Buffy (yep, it was Buffy fest all night till 4am - second half of season 2 right till the end when Angel gets killed). :)

I absolutely *love* this blog. In fact this probably my fave blog of all time. I've read Marvel comics since I could read (my brother was an avid collector. He had, like, Spiderman Issue #1) and Hulk was one of my fave characters. I also had a thing for Thor (sorry, Hulk)... and Batman. Go have a read. I guarantee it'll make your day. :D