After several nights of blissful 5-7.5 first sleeps, Jack regressed to 2 hourly sleeps last night following a difficult 3 hours of putting him to bed. Thankfully after the 4am wake-up, he slept till 9am despite possibly an hour of fussing before his Dad was able to retrieve him from his cot and place him in our bed. He then slept till almost 1130am.

He's been fussy during the afternoons and especially so yesterday, and was unusually solemn last night at dinner, maybe from the almost all-day all-night regurgitation. I've been refraining from any caffeine whatsoever so I am ponderous to what may have caused the bad sleep. Babies always cry for a reason.

Meanwhile Boy has been constipated, traumatised twice when a strand of my hair got ingested and strung a piece of hard poo he couldn't shake off. I had to remove the poo twice. I have been refilling fresh water into the many bowls around and feeding them all more canned food.

His appetite hasn't been great lately, finishing only half his meal, and the day before he stepped outside when the door was open, stopped and looked around. I was so alarmed I quickly grabbed him back into the house. Later his Dad claims that he (and Sam too) has done it before but I don't remember it ever happening before.

It's been frustrating because I've been avoiding being out of the bedroom too much to avoid the hair-poo thing (my hair's falling out in clumps - a casualty of post-pregnancy) which makes it kind of hard to observe him. He still weighs 7kg and I've seen him drinking.

The kids have stopped bugging him since we've banned all kids from the bedroom (to avoid the hair-poo situation). No more so-called preferential treatment and they all get along. The past two days saw the older three perched on the couch: Buffy on the right couch head, Boy on the left (totally unscathed), and Tux shamelessly splayed on the couch itself.

Meanwhile, I've spent the last few weekends catching up on my fave TV series: Firefly, Surface, and Prison Break. It's sad how the former two were cancelled after the first season. There doesn't seem much support for sci-fi genres. Both are extremely shiny and original. Prison Break is neat because of Wentworth Miller and the smart concept. I read the whole story in text, downloaded into my iPaq. Ah finally some use for it. ;D

Private Space Habitat Could Launch by 2010

For us crazy spacer wannabes, it has begun...

Yay! Jack slept 6 hours straight last night and it was like a zombie cure serum for me! :) I can actually smile without it being forced. I can't say my photographic memory is back - that was one of the first casualties of pregnancy, but at least I remember my To-Dos without looking at my calendar. Jack's enjoying some tummy time now and saying Boo repeatedly and finally burping spontaneously! :D

I've finally gotten round to reading Michio Kaku's Parallel Worlds since two nights ago. It's been a really fascinating read, bringing back the wonderment of the old days. It's staggering how absolutely tiny we are in the scheme of things. Considering how the black hole in the centre of our galaxy is several million times of the mass of our Sun (which is pretty gargantuan already if you ask me) and is 1/10 the size of Mercury's orbit.

It was probably better therapy for me than watching Firefly, to be honest. Since childhood, I've had an intuitive distinction for what's reality and what's not. That explains why horror movies never frighten me. I can't say I'll ever have the opportunity to travel through a wormhole but that the possibility is more real to me than living the exciting life as a smuggler on Serenity. It's ironic, because I'll never get to do both in my lifetime.

Firefly is based on science fiction. Space travel is pretty darned dangerous: radiation, machine failure, the list goes on... It just seemed rather unrealistic (albeit very fun). Parallel Worlds is based on science, as counterintuitive as quantum mechanics is to the mind.

I'm probably contradicting myself as I go along (I haven't had my cuppa green tea), but I think the difference for me is that when I turn off the telly, I know the specific experience of living on Serenity is gone forever (till I watch it again). But when I put down the book, wormholes and parallel universes are still real and wondrous for me.

It gradually crept up on me... from 6 hours to 5 hours to 4 hours to 2-3 hours every sleep session at night. Yes, the dreaded 4-month Sleep Regression.

None of the fancy books written by MDs mentioned that. Nor did they mention stress incontinence, hair falling out, or any of the other nasty things that happen to all new moms. So save your money and buy MY book, um... when I do write it.

Anyhoo, 5 days of drastically broken sleep were about all I could handle. I was zombie by day and zombie by night. What concentration I had I channelled to work. What good humour I had were focused on baby. There was very little left that I had to call myself human. Then again, the definition of human is quite variable...

Over the weekend I zoned out watching Firefly and even got a little depressed after it was over, feeling a little abandoned by my new friends on their new yet-unscripted adventures. I've always wanted to explore space but don't reckon I'll be able to do so in my lifetime. I did inherit shiny and gorram so all is not lost.

Yesterday baby went for his 2nd innoculation. He squealed once when jabbed and then was okay when it was over. He is 7kg now and 63cm. Heavy for his age but a normal height for his age. His Dad was so proud.

Speaking of eating, we tried rice cereal on Monday since he keeps eyeing our food very enviously. He tried some but didn't show much interest. It didn't help him sleep as promised.

He has been a verbose baby since day one, crying GIIIIII when he was just 2 weeks old, saying Goo when he was about a month (or was it 2 months), and in the last week, starting on Boo, last Saturday saying Baba, and today saying Bebe (which I'd been calling him recently).

Oh yes, back on the sleep thing. It's apparently normal as baby is allegedly learning lots now and can't sleep because his brain is active at night. I can empathise.

Baby finally slept 6 hours straight last night but I was awake till time unknown with my old friend Insomnia on an unexpected visit. He did wake up and talked a little to himself, but fortunately fell asleep again after. I remember the important lesson about teaching your child how to fall asleep himself. I don't think he's forgotten.

I figured it was either: teething, sleep regression, or my diet. The one thing I did different last night was eat more meat. (I also fed him 3 times from 10pm - he slept for a bit after - 11pm, and midnight.) It is possible that the lack of protein in my diet in the last few days could have been responsible for his bad sleep. Now that I gobbled up more meat, he slept pretty much all the way through. My boobs had been pretty soft before too but they are starting to spray again today.

So the diet explanation has my vote...

For today.

At the 5am feed I found myself nursing Jack and adoringly watching Boy groom himself most thoroughly from head to toe. I love this little boy in a cat suit so much. 14.5 years together. It's been a wonderful journey that I hope would never end. Hence my constant worry about his health. Blockages can be fatal. I've been keeping an eagle eye on his litter box habits but between work and baby, it's been hard catching him in action.

So I did what any mother in my position would do. I raised the ire of the other kids and let him sleep in the bedroom with us. Since before bedtime till the last feed I fretted when he didn't use the pan. Twice yesterday afternoon he sniffed at it but didn't use it. I realise I'd forgotten to empty it after bringing it in. So I did. But still no dice. But he was drinking well and eating a lot.

Finally at the 8am feed he followed me to the bathroom and used the pan. After what seemed like eternity, he got up and cleaned himself methodically, from his feet to his paws. I stared into the pan and the anxiety drained from me. It was a large puddle, the size of my hand. I looked at Boy lovingly as he finished grooming and meowed for food. I told him later. I had to feed his baby brother first.

He understood, making himself comfortable while I nursed the baby, who seemed more interested in engaging me in a conversation than feeding.... He watched Jack fascinatedly, possibly pondering how something so small that looks and smells like Mom came to exist. We shared many blinks - cat language for I love you. I've never felt more content, with these two children close to me.

Update: He peed another respectable puddle at 920am and again, a palm-sized puddle at 11am (the latter time after his breakfast and I discovered he'd scurried to pee in the PeeWee pan which I placed in the hallway with newspaper shreddings of course!)

The theory has been refuted. :p But he does look so cute and snug in his sleeping bag.

The night before Jack slept 6 hours, played for 2 (530-730am), and then slept for another 3.

But last night we both slept at 0030am and then at 230am I was awakened by his cry. He fed while I kept dozing off sitting up. Thank goodness for the bed rail... He woke again at 6 and nursed till 7. I couldn't quite sleep till almost 8 and then woke at 9 for work. The cuppa green tea helped some but the compounded sleeplessness is taking its toll.

It doesn't help that I've been worried sick about Boy's condition. But good news came later today.

The other (very frivolous) good news is I can take chocolate again without him puking up a storm and I'm back to my pre-pregnancy weight from sheer stress, sleeplessness, and having no time to eat.

I think I've found the Holy Grail of getting your baby to sleep through the night. The past two nights Jack slept 9 hours straight. He woke up once last night at 5am but sucked his hand and fell asleep without crying out at all.

The secret? A sleeping bag for babies. Mine cost 38.50 from Isetan. It is quilted cotton and polyester. It wears like a mermaid suit or a garment bag or with a zip in the front. I'd bought the largest size simply because it was the only size they had in stock which was blue. The constant temperature makes for a comfortable sleep, especially for a baby who has loved kicking off his blankets since he was born.

Sure this is just a sample size of one over an observation period of 2 days. But the simple reason of getting a sleeping bag to avoid your baby suffocating in his blankets is reason enough to buy the sleeping bag. The sleeping through the night is the icing on the cake.

Mike sent me the great news: Asunder, a poem we collaborated on and which appeared in Starline last year, has earned an Honourable Mention in The Year's Best Fantasy and Horror 2006: 19th Annual Collection.

Having gone on hiatus for 2 years now, I hadn't expected anything after last year (for work published the year before) so this has been a wonderful surprise! :D

I think I've figured out the culprit. Orange juice and very possibly chocolate and green tea. Jack's slept well and more fuss-free the last few nights without the violent spew fest of the week before. Just a burp or two and he was well off into slumberland.

It's been hard giving up my favourite drinks but for the sake of a happy baby and less sleep deprivation. Cumulative sleep deprivation can cause madness, albeit temporary. I'm starting to recover from last week now (or was it the week before?) but still need a + 3 sleep here and there.

Using my SPCA diary to chart sleep and food choices now. Baby still asleep after his third sleep cycle. Declared day time but let him sleep on.

Sleep: 4.5 + 3 (2) + 3
Dinner: Seafood crispy noodles + crysanthemum tea + dragon beard candy (some milk but no tea all day... *sob*)

Beautiful moment over weekend: Seeing 14 year-old Boy roll around playfully in the sun like a baby kitten. :D

Last night although there was quite some fussing, Jack did let me watch my weekly dose of TV, Lost. There were some moments I had to carry him standing but the viewing was pretty smooth sailing. Afterwards I changed him and fed him again. He seemed inconsolable at one point but I realised he might want to be put to bed already. And it worked like a charm. He cooed and gurgled and finally fell asleep by midnight.

He didn't wake again till 5am (back to normal!), nursed for half an hour. I took the opportunity to trim his nails while he rooted half asleep wiggling like a marionette, and changed his diaper. He slept almost instantly when he returned to his crib.

The next time he woke was 830am. He fed quickly and went to sleep within 15 minutes. I'm not sure when he woke again but he fussed, cried once (as I was getting ready to pick him up), and fell back asleep. The next time - daytime declared - was 1130am. He nursed hungrily (while crying "Gi!") and cooed when I changed him and played him his Mozart.

After a few nights of sleep deprivation, last night was a reprieve. I can only conclude that it was either something I ate or a growth spurt. Probably both.

My Dad is happily playing with him now. :D

Sleep: 5 + 3.5 (3) + 3 (2.5)
Song: Crazy by Gnarls Buckley - yesterday his Dad and I danced him to the song while he shrieked in glee. He likes it more than Be My Baby!